Life Style

The Sad Truth About Casual Hookups

Casual sex: Men wish they ‘d had more of it, and ladies wish they ‘d had much less, at least according to latest research. Researchers believe biology and advancement are to blame, however others recommend this reasoning overlooks the important role culture plays in individuals’s attitudes towards sexuality.

What’s the Deal?
Three recent studies surveyed more than 24,000 participants’ mindsets about their own sexual history and found that, while ladies tended to regret having sex (who they lost their virginity to, cheating on a partner, etc.), guys regretted missing out on it (being too shy to make a move, not being even more sexually adventurous, and so on). In reality, while males and females were discovered to take part in casual sex in relatively equal numbers, women reported more– and much more extreme– regrets about hookups.

The researchers concluded their outcomes (and the standards themselves) were mostly rooted in “ancient choice pressures”– or the male instinct to spread his seed vs. the female instinct to prevent pregnancy. But they neglect numerous additional elements. For one thing, it is very important to note the relative heteronormativity of the research design: Just one of these 3 studies included participants who recognized as queer, lesbian, or bisexual, possibly restricting the generalizability of the findings to straight individuals just. For another, they give just passing reference to the effective function cultural stereotypes and preconceptions might play in people’s relationships to their own sexuality.

Why It Matters.
Missing from the scientists’ conclusions (but hopefully not from additional research study) is how social standards and sexual double standards for men and women (” slut-shaming,” for instance) affect people’s sexual decision-making. Cultural stereotypes may make guys feel pressured to seek Casanova status, for example, and play a role in women feeling conflicted or regretful about the sex they have actually had along with their ability to delight in the sex they’re having.

Females are more likely to accomplish orgasm in committed relationships than in casual hookups.

Meanwhile, two other studies have actually found that women are most likely to achieve orgasm in committed relationships than in casual connections. In this case, the researchers think men are more attentive sexual partners in relationships and that two individuals making love repeatedly makes both better at it, which might result in better sex and even more orgasms for ladies. Perhaps women regret sex with a committed partner less since they delight in the sex more.

What all this points to is that, when it pertains to our feelings about our sex lives, a lot of aspects– including but not limited to our biological impulses– are at play. Guy might be driven to “spread their seed,” but they’re also influenced by cultural expectations of sexual prowess. Similarly, without investigating how perceptions of female sexual habits effect women’s feelings about– and therefore pleasure of– one-night stand, it’s difficult to fully understand why ladies are taking pleasure in sex less and regretting it more.

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